I am staring at a student loan bill from American Educational Services. It says my installment loan is 2,205. behind with a current amount due of 737.00 with 44.00 outstanding late fees and principal and interest due of nearly 3,000. I owe it all now. I took out 33,000. in student loan debt to finish a Ph.D as a single parent with kids who at the time were toddlers. It took about seven years to finish my M.A. and Ph.D and I started a job as an academic at a salary of 32,000. per year in 1992. It has taken me twenty years to earn a salary of 83,000. annually at the same institution. I have always wanted to buy a home, but with the student loan debt I have hanging over my head, I am scared to death to even try to take on a mortgage (and frankly to even apply for one since I am a single-income household in an expensive urban area). I could probably own a small home by now if I were not looking at this bill whose outstanding total balance is 119,750+. I love my job. I had a chance to file bankruptcy and delete this debt several years ago, but chose not to because I felt a moral obligation to pay it back since I am an academic. Now I wish I had. My daughters are now married, self-sufficient, starting families and buying their first homes. I am glad that they will be likely to have something that I wish I could have provided for them during their growing years. Ahhh. . . depresses me to think about this. I am so competent in so many other areas of my life and I love my job. This black cloud makes me feel like such a failure.